By the time I was 32 I found myself stuck in a cycle of drinking too much on weekends, and then suffering from hangovers that lasted several days. Married with an 18 month old son, I was struggling to keep up. Once I realized that I didn’t need alcohol like I had thought, my life was forever changed. My husband and I had been together for seven years when I quit drinking. We both had to figure out what our lives, and relationship, looked like without alcohol. Your spouse may experience relapses or have difficulty adhering to treatment recommendations.
- Numbers reported are as of 2013, the most recent year figures are available.
- Witnessing the love of your life struggle with drug addiction can be heartbreaking and overwhelming.
- What’s more, these exact feelings may be a part of what triggers your partner, meaning they may need your help to control overwhelming emotions during addiction recovery.
- Opening a conversation with your partner about his drinking may seem scary.
Signs your loved one is in denial
And finally, remember that you can’t logic shame out of a person; you must love it out of them patiently. Our intensive three-day workshops also discuss attachment theory which can be relevant to people experiencing shame. For example, your spouse might decide they don’t want to have contact with anyone, even other family members. This is called dismissing avoidance, and we devote an Alcoholics Anonymous entire section to these issues at the workshop. People who feel shame often won’t be very transparent about why they are feeling shame.
- Behavioral treatments include individual, group, and family therapy sessions.
- Consider talking to people that are professionals on the subject and ask anything that is not clear to you about addiction.
- Watching a friend or family member struggle with a drinking problem can be as heartbreakingly painful as it is frustrating.
- With patience, compassion, and understanding, you can work towards rebuilding trust and creating a healthier future for both of you.
Lakeview Health

You, too, might realize that your relationship with alcohol is negatively affecting your life. And you might find that you feel healthier and happier without it. If your loved one is in denial or doesn’t want to seek treatment, how to overcome alcoholism they’re not alone. According to the 2019 National Survey on Drug Use and Health,about 14.5 million people have an AUD, and yet only 7% received treatment that year. In short, “there’s not a single image of AUD,” points out Sabrina Spotorno, a clinical social worker and alcoholism and substance abuse counselor at Monument. The pathway to healing and recovery is often a journey that can progress over multiple years.

Rebuilding Trust After Treatment
Addicts https://kokwetnsw.org/how-to-communicate-and-deal-with-an-avoidant/ can be especially skillful at concealing their problems from others, and that includes their spouse or potential spouse. It may be only after you’re married that you realize your partner has a substance abuse problem, and then all your attention goes to helping your addicted spouse. Living with an alcoholic spouse can be fraught with emotional distress, financial strain and a deep sense of uncertainty.
